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The “Rainy Days” of Relationships

Today was another rainy autumn day in NYC. Usually, I feel sad when it rains, but today I changed my mind and started seeing rain as the gift that it really is. Besides the obvious knowledge that rain is essential for the earth and to clean the streets… rain makes me feel clean, too. Besides that, it’s soothing. The sound of the rain numbs the noise that, in Midtown Manhattan, is almost unbearable.

If rain lasts too long, however, I start longing for the sun, a longing that I would not enjoy is the sun was out everyday.

The same concept applies to relationships. We need to feel the highs and the lows to make things interesting. The important thing to remember when you are in the low state is that you will enjoy the high again.

How do you move through the low times in your relationship?
Are you aware of the wave like quality of relationships and flow with it with faith, or are you thinking the relationship is ruined and this is the beginning of the end?

I would love to hear your thoughts or questions!

With Love and Light,
Carla

{ 3 comments… add one }
  • Bridget November 18, 2008, 11:10 am

    While I am in a low point in my relationship I see it as a beggining to an end now. I have been waiting for the high to return; by detaching from the relationship or better yet the behaviors that I dislike in the relationship, the relationship ceases to exsist. Blown away in the wind and carried with the rain down a drainage pipe in the street. When relationships are not fed with emotion, love, understanding at even at time a good fight they wither. I love the rain too but when it lasts as long as it has I’m beginning to feel how Lewis and Clark must have felt the winter held up in a stick cabin in the barren uninhabited northwest, alone, cold, tired and frustrated.

  • Carla November 18, 2008, 3:11 pm

    Thank you for sharing your frustration about your relationship. You are absolutely right, when the relationship is not nurtured and cared for, it shrivels and slowly dies. Opening up lines of communication with your lover is important. He needs to know your needs for deeper connection. Detaching leads to continued rain until the love is washed away. Setting up the space for communication can be a challenge at times because men are usually afraid of complaints when we say, “we need to talk,” and avoid any discussion. You might invite him to look at something that will get you closer. Sometimes men love to be approached physically to know they are wanted. Women usually want to talk before they can open up physically. Knowing this will help you approach the situation in the most positive way.

  • Don November 20, 2008, 8:20 am

    I agree that detaching yourself from the behavior that you dislike in a relationship only makes that rainy day seem longer. I enjoy the rain too, but with the rainy days come dark clouds. Dark clouds that overshadow our lives sometimes. But I take comfort in the fact that above those dark clouds, is a loving, warm and energetic sun waiting for it’s turn to shine through.