A popular online men’s magazine, Askmen.com, recently ran an article by David DeAngelo called “Top 10: Ways To Succeed With Any Woman.” When you boil them down, David’s ten ways all return to a common theme – that a man needs to be secure within himself.
I love most of the ways David suggests that a man do this in this interesting article, especially his advice: “Don’t give all of yourself to just any woman,” and “Stop worrying about what she’s thinking.” To these, I would add “be more concerned with what both you and she are feeling when you are with each other.”
I do have to disagree with David though, on suggesting that a man should feel like a star, with the women in his life revolving around him like planets. A star is often seen as perfect, as greater than life… And many stars feel they don’t match the projections put on them and don’t feel very good inside. Some of them I talk with say “If they knew how stressful my life is and how difficult it is to keep the appearance of having it all together!…”
To me, the more real the man is and therefore showing his human qualities, the more a real woman likes him, and then she can safely and powerfully rise in love with him.
If he behaves like a star, she might think he’s too much for her, or see him as cocky, or– if she’s not as mature, she might be tempted to please him all the time — because she does feel like a planet revolving around him.
If he is mature he might not like that at all.
Playing at “being a star” might be acceptable for teenagers, but not for mature lovers.
A real man loves to make his woman happy and treats her like a Goddess.
A real man knows how to pay attention to her and discover who she really is.
If she shows her real self, his greatest pleasure is seeing her happy in life and in ecstasy in sex. The more he shows his affection and knows how to make her happy, the higher his self-esteem as a man goes.
Of course, he wants to be treated with full respect and love as well. To me, that is the best approach to be successful with any woman.