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On July 4th every year, we celebrate the independence of our Nation. But our independence in the physical world is in vain if we still live as prisoners of our minds and thoughts.

So today, I’m inviting you to celebrate your independence from those negative comments that often come into your mind uninvited. You know very well that once you open the door to these uninvited guests you will feel uncomfortable, tense, and some level of ‘I’m not good enough.’ [click to continue…]

22_by_cosmic1255People say you can’t read someone else’s mind. Each one of us has a different map of relationships and emotions and thoughts in our heads that can be as different as the maps of different countries.

But there is another side to this story. We know that the mind is intrinsically connected with the body. In fact,  body language is clearer and often more honest that communication using words.  And this can be even truer in intimate relationships,

Often lovers use a barrage of words to avoid saying a deeper truth or to convince the lover that they are right. In these cases, real communication happens most likely after calming contradicting emotions, relaxing the body and getting clear about what’s important.

How often have you tried to get something across to your lover and feel frustrated because he “never listens” to you, or “he does not care”? And while you are busy thinking about that, you are not in a clear space to understand his response.

Lucille, a women I’m coaching, was in tears when she told me what happened when her man came in the door excited that a large company finally signed the contract he had been working hard for months. She did not notice his excitement.

She was emotionally closed off in her own frustration about what happened in school with their son, and immediately dumped her frustration on him for “not caring enough for their son”. Only then, she told me, she noticed his expression of pain. She went over to hug him and apologized for her outburst.

It took some soothing before he could tell her about his success and his concern for their son. She was grateful that she had learned to shift fast from angry to concerned when she read his body language.

So, you can read your partner’s mind if you are paying attention. Everyone knows the signs of tension: tight jaw, raised shoulders, shallow breathing. These physical signs give away the state of mind your lover is in.

And when you do see these signs of tension and stress, and they are getting in the way of verbally communicating, it often helps to connect physically instead, perhaps by just taking a couple of breaths and offering a physical connection, even just holding hands works. A smile is often reassuring to a defensive partner that it is safe to speak your mind.

So, the next time you are trying to communicate clearly, center & calm yourself, and then take a moment to observe your lover’s body and use the openness of your own physical presence answer theirs. You may be surprised how much starting the non-verbal conversation helps the verbal one go more smoothly.


Are you struggling to make meaningful changes in your relationship?  Would you like to pump some energy into a faded passion?  I can help!  Join me for an upcoming workshop, or schedule a private coaching session with me for the most effective transformation.

Exploring Ecstay Image Man WomanLonger orgasms and reverence for each other is a winning combination in Tantra. Why?

Seeing your lover as a divinity inspires you to really focus on tantric techniques to bring more pleasure to each other for a longer time, which will result in longer orgasms.

Reverence is a mental attitude that turns you on.

Imagine a Goddess materializing in front of you with all the sensuous beauty and splendor you can imagine; wouldn’t you be completely taken by her?

Wouldn’t you bring your lovemaking to a different level when this Goddess wants to make love with you?

The use of visualization is essential to Tantra. Imagination can transform your attitude from one of boredom to one of excitement and deep joy.

Imagine you are making love to a Divinity: would that inspire you to take your time to build the energy up big times, enjoying every glance, every kiss. You would especially pay attention to her reaction to your touch so you can adapt it to provide maximum pleasure.

Tantra tells us about the importance of having longer orgasms. Why?

It’s because during orgasm your mind is finally still, and you feel a sense of merging that is beyond the mind, thus we call it “a mind-blowing orgasm”.

Yes, a tantric Orgasm blows the mind away from stressing about performance and instead you get a glimpse of the reality of your divine nature.

But even longer orgasms are shorter than you would like. They are not long enough to create a deep understanding of our Divine Reality.

The good news is that when you fully focus on building an amazing Orgasm instead of letting them happen randomly, you will experience a sense of merging that echoes the pleasure and satisfaction of your physical orgasm. And you can expand the foreplay as close to Orgasm as long as you both want.

You can also experience multiple body orgasms that can be achieved following the powerful Tantric techniques of breathing, love muscles control, Kama Sutra positions, and other ways of building longing for merging with your lover.

We are lucky that we have access to this 5,000 years old Tantric wisdom!
Let me guide you in expanding your sexual and Divine Reality.

morguefile-kissingstatues2bTantra teaches that love seeks expression through our bodies. Love is our essence, our Soul. From time to time, we might have glimpses of our soul; however, we resist experiencing it fully. We do not trust love. We want to feel it, but we also are afraid of it. This creates the most basic human struggle, our most essential tension between love and fear. [click to continue…]

Tantric picture for open centerKama Sutra translates to “love verses”… perhaps because certain positions are as expressive as poetry.

The Kama Sutra can be daunting; steeped in all that history and known by many new to it as ‘those crazy pretzel-like sex positions”. But the Kama Sutra can be simplified for non yogic couples.

The following are some simplified Kama Sutra Positions for the modern, non yogic couples.

Woman on Top: The woman’s body is on top of the man’s. She plays for a while using all variations of this classic sex position, such as holding his lingam like a paintbrush and using it to ‘paint’ herself, making small gentle circles on and around her clitoris. In this position, she can also experiment with 1 inch penetration, arousing her man by building suspense. Finally, when she’s ready, she swallows his lingam into her yoni using her love muscles.

If you are feeling more limber, try these different variations:
-The woman kneels upright over the man.
-Crouching on her feet
-Leaning back on her elbows.

Couple on the Side: This position allows you to make love with your partner, in a position like ‘spooning’. The Man lies behind the woman with his tummy to her back. From here, he can enter her yoni at different angles. As a bonus, he can also reach his arms around her-drawing her in close or caressing her breasts.

Man on Top (Missionary)
The man lies on top of the woman, her legs aim to be as wide open as possible. This lets you look into each other’s eyes, which many people find very sexy and arousing.

If you’re a bit flexible, these missionary variations can be very hot:
-Slowly, she lifts one leg over his shoulder, then the other.
-She lifts her buttocks and crosses her feet behind his neck.
-She tightens her legs together to allow for more friction.

Doggy style: A classic position for steaming things up! Try this with the man entering the woman from different angles and using different thrusting techniques; fast, slow, hard, soft etc. This is a great position to pleasure her g spot. ‘Doggy style’ is one of the best for it!

It’s very hot, but it’s difficult to see each other’s faces and so you loose some of the intimacy. Perhaps try this position facing a mirror so you can look at each other’s faces (and bodies…) while you have sex.

Yub Yum: A classic and very sacred tantric Kama Sutra position. The man sits crossed legged, and the woman sits facing him on his lap, with her legs wrapped around his back. Arms holding each others lower back for support.

In this position all of their chakras are aligned and the couple can undulate together, lingam in yoni experiencing deep pleasure. This position facilitates the rising of hot sexual energy to the crown chakra, accelerating the experience of ‘enlightened’ Union.

Important Note:
Always take care that connection with your lover is the most important element in your lovemaking.

Kama Sutra describes the art of pleasure. It represents only one tenth of Tantric Knowledge, but because it stirs up curiosity, it serves as a great entry into the world of Tantric treasures.

Most of my clients came to me because they had heard of Kama-Sutra, and then they fell in love with the whole Tantric approach.

Stay tuned for the next piece on Kama Sutra: The Tantric Art of Thrusting.

A woman in her 30’s came to see me because she wanted help in finding someone special in her life. Perhaps Tantra would help?

She had the right idea. Tantra helps because it requires self-love before you can really merge into love with another.

However, when I started talking about self-love she got really upset. “How can you do it? I hate my looks and I hate my stubbornness. I thought you could teach me some Tantric tricks so I can win him over.”

Tantric techniques only work well when you come from self-love. Because,  they are not actually tricks. You cannot trick anyone, really. [click to continue…]

How would you handle this situation?

Your girlfriend came to your appointment late because she stopped to talk to her x-boyfriend. Two things here have to be considered. One, she’s late; two, she stopped to speak to her x-boyfriend with whom she said has no longer contact.

Scenario one:
You read her language: calm movements, soft relaxed facial expression and “knew” everything was OK. You say: “I’m glad you are here” and give her a big hug and a kiss.

She is elated that you trusted her enough not to want to know the smaller details of her delay. She was extremely grateful. Her feeling of gratitude started to spread in her body as a waive-like bubbling flow that transformed into more love. Her heart opened more fully, her smile a beautiful rose in bloom.

Scenario B:

You express your upset that she’s late, as usual, and then say: “Why did you stop to speak to your ex-boyfriend? What was is so important about it? You know I hate when you are late…. I thought you had completion with him. You declared it yesterday! How can I trust you?”

She starts defending by attacking youfor being controlling and… This was the beginning of a long fight that became increasingly vicious. The wonderful evening you had imagined and planned for turned into a disaster.

It’s not difficult to guess what scenario resulted in a great evening!

Tantra teaches that when a woman’s heart opens her sexual energy opens as well. When there is chemistry between a man and a woman love wants to express itself both with a soft and sexy look and body language that clearly expresses invitation to go deeper into intimacy. A smart man who loves her knows how to respond to such ebullient offer.

Take a moment to ask yourself what your habitual response to something unpleasant is. What scenario do you usually choose when something interferes with your plans? Can you keep your heart open enough to read each other’s body language before you attack?

Tantra teaches fast and easy techniques how to shift from upset to relaxed. Making love does not start in bed!


Do you want to learn more ways to increase passion in and out of the bedroom?

Join me for my next New York couples workshop: How To Keep Your Spouse HOT and HAPPY!  on Friday, March 27th

Tantric OrgasmOrgasms for women get better and more intense if they understand their bodies and their partners learn some Tantric principles. [click to continue…]

Guest post by Sherri Goodman.

Ladies, there are some things that we all cringe to think about—much less talk about. But there are

many women’s issues we deal with throughout our lives that we don’t have to just endure quietly. The

more you know about some of the things that may be bothering you, the more you can do to achieve

greater satisfaction.

The road of women’s issues is a long and rocky one. From the first time we get our period when we’re

in young adolescence to the time we reach menopause, which the NIA says is on average age 51, we

have a whole host of roadblocks to overcome.

Let’s talk about some of the issues, as well as many of the most effective and natural solutions. [click to continue…]

Do you ever wonder what emotions are empowering and which are robbing you of your energy?  Tantra teaches you how to smartly switch from complaining to receiving what you want.   It increases energy that makes you feel good.

When you have more energy, you see your partner (and others) from a more expanded place. You are more accepting, more compassionate, and more passionate.

Finding out what keeps your energy high is one of the most important pieces of self-knowledge that can catapult your currently lukewarm relationship to a higher, more vibrant place where you will often be in a state of powerful harmony with your partner.

How can this be?

Because when an obstacle or delay comes up in a moment of low energy, it can be disappointing or even frustrating to you.  If you experience the same event when you are in a high-energy state, you do not react defensively; you become curious instead, and are open to learn more about yourself and about your lover so you can give each other what you deeply desire.

Tantra teaches to protect this empowering state, a state that improves both your health and your relationships. The best protection is to keep focusing on it, and avoid any negative thoughts that interfere and take root in your consciousness.

There are amazing Tantric techniques that can give you the gift of sustaining high energy and passion.

A Tantric space is a very creative space when you can come up with easy and right solutions to challenges, and stay emotionally grounded to build up love from that space.

You do not react from your egotistical place.  This state of high energy and pleasure feels too precious to be disturbed by complaining or by being defensive.  You can instead kindly and openly ask for what you want and your partner will be happy to give it to you.

Of course, shame, guilt and anger, all come from a powerless space.

I train men, women, and couples to transcend and transmute these emotions into higher vibrating states.  This turns normal sex into real love-making that can grow and grow as you deepen your connection.